Facing Our Clutter Fears

Facing Our Clutter Fears

When it comes to clutter, there can be many reasons why someone is fearful. They may be afraid if they let something go they may need it again or they won’t be able to replace it. 

You see, although in some respects the clutter represents chaos and being out of control, it can also for some, be a source of comfort.  Comfort in a way where one’s things replace or substitute areas of one’s life where they may be experiencing a sense of lack.

It is understandable one may “think” this, especially when the reason they held onto their stuff for so long was because it helped them through some difficult times.  So hence, letting go, may trigger other emotions that can create a sense of loss.

Fear are stories we tell ourselves and there can be many layers of fear.  Underneath these layers is usually something we are terribly afraid of. 

So how do we fight fear?  By facing it head on.

Here is where knowledge about one’s self becomes your best strategy to fight your fear.  Why?  Because it’s impossible to control something you know nothing about.  But you can control your outcome from what you understand.  Therefore, understanding what is driving your fear helps you not only confront what you are afraid of but helps you fight back and change it. 

Let’s take a hypothetical situation and use this as a case in point.  Let’s say you have a house full of clutter.  Your desire is to be organized and orderly.  However, you have much fear when it comes to releasing your stuff.  Yet, you feel equally fearful that if you don’t do something about it, it will really get out of control. 

One approach to overcoming your fear is to create a vision of what you would like to see happen for yourself.  An example would be, “I would like to have more open space in my home and have everything in its place.”  Then take a moment to visualize what that may actually look like in your home.

Next, ask yourself, “Why is this vision important to me?”  A simple answer may be, “I am tired of not being able to find my things and spending too much time looking for them.”

Another question from there may be, “How would this vision affect the quality of your life?” And an answer may be, “It would make my life more manageable, reduce stress and give me peace of mind.”

 Now let’s look at this together.  You have a house full of clutter.  You want to be clutter-free.  You want to be clutter free because you understand that it will provide you with a better quality of life.  This much we know so far.  Yes?

Okay, now we get to the good part.  Facing the fear head on…

So let me ask you something, “If you want all these things that you say you do, what’s stopping you?”  And you may answer with something like this, “Well, I’ve tried many times before but I never succeeded.  And I guess in truth, I’m “afraid” that I may need my things one day if I get rid of them I won’t be able to get them back.”

Aha!  There it is.  The thought that you planted in your head that you will never be able to recover something is so ingrained, that it paralyzes you from moving forward with your vision.  And the truth of the matter is that the chances of you never really being able to  find, obtain or purchase those “things” again is pretty slim.  So it’s an un-truth you told yourself that you “bought” into.  Hence, causing you to feel terribly afraid.

So here it is.  The story of fear and underneath all those layers is an untruth.  In part, it’s been the story you may have been telling yourself all this time because in some way it was helping you cope with something that may have been causing you distress.  Therefore, “letting go” may symbolize for you a loss of not having something important in your life when times get tough.  “For, if not for your clutter, what would you cling to?”

It’s fascinating, isn’t it?

But the good news is that today, you know better.  By facing what you are truly afraid of you have the power to change it.  You know this is just an old story that keeps replaying, over and over.  All you have to ask yourself now is “How would your life be different if you were able to overcome this?”  Just imagine the possibilities for you!

Note:

This is an excerpt of Patricia’s new book – Life Recovery for the Cluttered Soul; how to face your fears and transform your life which will be available this Spring.